Monday, July 2, 2007

Contrary to reports

I'm not dead. Nope. For a while, I was busier than a one-armed paper hanger.
Now that it's summer, I'm still busier than a one-armed paper hanger. Go figure, huh? But that's life and coming to the realization that this is the status quo can turn stress into good stress into good times. Happiness is often a decision and that is what I've decided to be.
Thus far, my son has graduated. Proud mom am I. College Freshmen orientation is already past. My 2 daughters had numerous end of the school year commitments, parties, banquests, etc. We had a house packed with company; fun games, good fellowship, outstanding BBQ & donuts (not at the same time).
In a couple of weeks, I leave for Alaska with the next generation of our church. I want to be excited. Really, I do. I love them so much it hurts. I want them to bypass all the mistakes that I made and my hubby made; long to keep them safe from angst, pain, tiffs and break-ups. Why do I stress before it's even arrived?
This past week, I was at Creation with a lot of them. We endured rainstorms. Bodily functions became topic for open conversation and humor. They sang and danced and sat around campfired swapping stories and playing pranks. I thoroughly enjoyed the impromptu hugs from them, the moments of insight and sharing. I died inside at their teen angst though. Not for all the Cadbury mini eggs, Long Island Iced Teas, tiramisus, creme brulees, unlimited shopping passes to my fave stores or websites without bodily or financial ramifications would I want to be a teenager again. What a wonderfully painful, messy time of life. Oh how every emotion is magnified, every action minutely and painstakingly broken down into segments and analyzed for motivation, every perceived slight becomes disproportionally an enormous blow-up.
No, not for all the world would I want to be a teen again. In most cases, the emotional maturity has not yet caught up with the physical maturity. These hormones on feet are running into walls without understanding why.
My daughter asks me what she should look for in a guy. At a loss, I bypassed the teen relationship books, the psychology classes, the pop culture answers and pointed to Ephesians where husbands are encouraged to love their wives as Christ love the church and gave himself up for her. To break that down, what it is basically saying is "Guys, love the one God created for you, put her needs before yours. If it comes down to it, throw yourself in front of a bus to protect her. Love and serve sacrificially." If she can find a guy who respects her, doesn't tear her down with words, barbs or cutting remarks, who shows that kind of sacrificial love to her then he's a candidate. If not, good riddance to bad rubbish.
I know I'm using too many words to oversimplify what is already perfectly written in the Big Instruction Manual.
As these teens experience this confusion and foibles of the heart, my heart aches for them and all I can do is pray (I know, it's the best thing to do) for their growing wisdom, discernment and emotionally security. That their hearts will be whole for the right guy or gal that God places in their life when the time is right. I've been praying for my children's spouses for years. Maybe I already know that young woman or those young men they will ultimately choose to love. Maybe I don't. My fervent desire is that though their relationship will endure it's fair share of peaks & valleys, that they are already praying for each other; that future love~whether that love is beginning now or in the distant future.

1 comment:

Kim said...

Welcome back! I missed you and your wise (and sometime wise-cracking) commentary.